Simon says...

I sang a duet in church with a friend on Sunday, and I have to be honest. Listening back to the recording, I thought she did great -- but I was a little disappointed in myself. I felt totally confident and comfortable when we rehearsed, but when the time came to sing it for the congregation I held back at certain parts and didn't let my voice out fully. It wasn't terrible, but I really didn't like feeling that way. 

I was thinking about it yesterday and started to feel like I had Simon Cowell's voice in my head, picking my performance apart like I'd heard him do so many times on American Idol back in the day.

But then I realized something.

Simon Cowell doesn't lead our church; Jesus does.

If this is true (and I strongly believe it is), I don't need to critique myself -- finding all of the opportunities for improvement -- like Simon would. It definitely wasn't perfect, but it also didn't need to be. Jesus Christ has the perfection covered. My job was to testify of Him, and create space for Him to touch people's hearts through the Spirit. That's all that was required. 

Whether it's music, speaking, teaching, creating, or serving, it's really easy to forget that and go into "performance" mode with our contributions. 9 times out of 10, we will fall short from what we wanted in some way. That can get discouraging. So thankfully that's not our only option. 

We have the alternate option to operate from "enough" mode, where we're so clear on our job that we can release everything else (including the need for impressing the wide variety of Simons in our lives). 

Don't get be wrong -- I'm still going to work on my singing and get as strong as I can for future musical numbers. But as far as last Sunday's musical number goes, I'm choosing to boldly stamp an "enough" on it and move forward with gratitude for the opportunity.