20 years

Today marks 20 years since Chris and I were married. I had a tender time last night, reflecting on the feelings I had the night before our wedding day. I wasn't jittery, because I know for sure Chris was the one for me, and that God was 100% on board with our union. But I do remember feeling apprehensive, wondering what the years and decades ahead would bring, and what we'd experience together.

I wish I could pop into that basement apartment where I was making final preparations (aka puttering around doing random non-essentials because I was too excited to sleep), and sit down with that bride-to-be. I would tell her that the views ahead would be more astonishing than she could imagine. I'd give her a glimpse into what 20 years with Chris Ironroad looks like.

• 20 years looks like seeing each other in a thousand different ways -- elated, discouraged, strong, weak, ill, injured, confident, victorious, insecure, unshaken, and everywhere in between...and still finding each other incredibly attractive.
• 20 years looks like laughing (almost) every day at something each other says or does.
• 20 years looks like saying "yes" to each other again and again, letting go of what no longer works and building new pieces of our relationship.
• 20 years looks like growing the most beautiful family full of people who love God and love each other.
• 20 years looks like pushing through struggle, sometimes together; sometimes on our own.
• 20 years looks like constantly dreaming bigger and reaching higher because he is so sure you can do it.
• 20 years looks like each of us feeling lonely and broken sometimes but knowing it was temporary.
• 20 years looks like honesty and vulnerability, when it would be so much easier to avoid discomfort.
• 20 years looks like having the best time together, from lunch dates and grocery store runs to fancy galas.
• 20 years looks like being excited for a new change in his golf swing because you see how much it lights him up.
• 20 years looks like seeing him repeatedly sacrifice his own broken heart, just for the chance to see you shine.
• 20 years looks like coming back stronger than ever.
• 20 years looks like seeing him hold our little girl, laugh with our teen girls, and mentor our son with so much love and joy you can't help but cry.
• 20 years looks like losing at most family game nights but feeling like you won because you get to hear his laugh.
• 20 years looks like STILL feeling like a queen by his side, just like you did on this same day, 20 years ago.

Our first kiss was under the stars during a meteor shower (true story. magical.), and that was just the beginning. I like to think it was Heaven celebrating that we found each other because of the moments ahead that would be even more spectacular than that.

Happy anniversary, Handsome. Here's to the next 20, and an eternity of laughing, dreaming, building, and growing together.

You're everything.